Is there anyone else who, for crying out loud, who is worried about the Foodies on the Travel channel and Food Network? You know the ones; Charismatic, funny and bold? They are all about the attention, and even more so: THE FOOD. We sit back, with our American mouths watering, envying every moment that one of these Foodies gets to taste the sweetest, most savory, crispiest or some other extreme form of grub. We promise ourselves and those who are watching with us, that one day, we are going to travel down to Fay's Diner in Chatmookansas to taste her world famous, hole in the wall, cherry-cream-spicy-bacon cake. As the Foodies tell us how much we "gotta try it", we eat up every word, go to the kitchen and get something to snack on. Hey, if we can't get our hands on Delia's Famous Fried breakfast wrap, at least we can have a crunchy bowl of chips to pass the time. I do this. My husband and I sit during dinner, with our children, and watch the Foodies tease us with dreams of pineapple turnovers and barbecue that will make you slap your knees because it's just that great. We all wonder if there is a location here in our own state, and can we possible make a trip there for the weekend.
Well, today while I was eating my homemade beef stew, Adam Richman joined me for dinner by taking on the Great Taco Challenge at Uncle Julio's or Mama Tia's or wherever he was. I lost my appetite. It wasn't because it was disgusting to see him shoveling mounds of dead meat and cheese into his mouth, his eyes glazed over with insanity. It was because I wondered how much can the human system take before it begins to break down? I mean, I don't know all the details as far as how long this guy has been eating mounds of greasy fried stuff for a living or how many laxatives he takes to get the stuff out. I just know that I see at least three or four episodes everyday, where he tackles challenges that include pounds of fried meat, smothered in globs of thick and creamy sauce and then washes it down with....vitamins? Celery? Fresh spinach? Nah. How about another challenge, where even the pigs are looking in the window asking him to slow down? I mean, I can see if once a year, he ate a whole turkey or polished off a rack of lamb, without any help. I don't see how it is humanly possible to go on and make a living from inhaling enough meat to feed a lion for a month, on a regular basis. You would be delusional to think that if this guy keeps on, we will not see him on the news because he landed himself in the hospital while choking on a piece of livestock. Now, of course I don't want to see that happen to the poor goof ball, but we tend to not think about television personalities as real people. They are just entertainment. Not so.
I think about what that guy goes through on the toilet after a round of habanero chicken wings with no chaser. It's unimaginable. Do you see what I am saying? Dear Adam, I think your show is great, however I would like to see you on a quest to look for the most savory, scrumptious and biggest orange or banana once in a while. Yes, it would be boring, but I bet you need a colon cleansing like nobody's business. Does anyone else agree? I mean, I wouldn't watch it, but I would feel better if I knew at least one episode was dedicated to a vegetable rather than doing another pursuit of the tastiest artery-clogger on a stick.
